Put Your Heels Down and Get Mad

My daughters enjoy riding horses. Actually they enjoy all-things horse.  What I know is that this love comes honestly.  I have the love.  What I forgot is all of the life lessons that can be learned from riding and well, horses.

I know there are volumes of books written on the subject.  I can only pull from my experiences today.  My middle child is an undercover worker bee.  She has a little bit of grit to work toward a goal.  Fairly laid back, so one would not always notice her grit, but it is there.  Sometimes you have to dig deep for that grit. 

Sometimes you have to trust others, who are wiser than you.  Sometimes you also have to trust you can do this.  Horses can really push some of these things out of the very bottom of yourself and the tips of your toes.

On a beautiful day recently we went to the barn for a riding lesson.  My girls ride at a barn where there are always lessons and usually the swapping of assigned steeds for the lesson.  Erin is their instructor and owner of the barn. She is an accomplished teacher, rider and has a degree from a wonderful riding college.  Most importantly, she has years of experience.  Horse experience.

Let me stop right here and let you know that I am no horse expert.  I did not go to a riding college.  I did grow up riding and owned a pony for a little while.  I also immersed myself into all things horse for a portion of my young life.  So, I may be a little rusty on the horse front, but I have a fair amount of intuition left in me.  When the girls started riding at this barn a few years ago, I felt it was a good fit.  Erin knows what she is doing, she knows her horses and she seems to quickly know the young riders.  There was my intuition nudging me.  A good fit and some wisdom to boot (pun totally intended)!

Conversations before a horse show

So on a glorious day in early February, we arrived at the barn for a lesson.  The barn office is the hub where riders are greeted and the riders are assigned a horse for the lesson.  The girls both raced into the barn to get started for the lesson.  On this day, I sat in the truck to watch the lesson and get a few things done.

Deep in thought, I was startled when the back door opened and shut quickly.  It was my middle child.  I turned to look at her and saw she was digging around for her water bottle.  So I turned back around as I said, “Oh you forgot your water?”

“Yup.”

I then heard her breathing change and I turned to find her starting to get upset.  I asked, “What is wrong?”  Middle Child explained that she was assigned to ride a particular horse that day for the lesson.  This was upsetting to her because this horse is sometimes…snarky.  She started going on about all the reasons she did not want to ride this horse.  Sometimes he bucks.  Sometimes he does not like other horses, oh and look there are others riding in the paddock now!  I am not sure Middle Child breathed as these fears rolled off her tongue.  I knew why she had some fear, this horse was indeed snarky.

So I finally got a word in between all of the heavy breathing.  I told Middle Child that Erin knew what she was doing.  She had her reasons for assigning that horse.  Erin also knew Middle Child as a rider.  She would not put Middle Child on this horse if there was not confidence it could be done.  I also said it might be tough but it would make her a better rider. 

“But what if he bucks?” she asked.

I replied, “Then just put your heels down and get mad.  Don’t let that horse win.  You win.  You have the last say.”  I went on to tell her if she can ride this horse, she could ride any horse there.

Middle Child pulled herself together and seemed to listen. 

She got out of the truck and headed into the barn.  A few minutes later, she emerged leading that snarky horse.  He followed her lead and they made their way to the paddock where others were starting to ride.  Erin was waiting and the lesson soon began.

I chose to stay in the car this time.  I could see the lesson and sometimes Mom needs to give some distance.  The lesson went smoothly from what I could see.  Afterwards, I spoke with Erin and she complimented Middle Child and her performance in the lesson.

When Middle Child finished all of the grooming in the barn, she emerged once again leading her horse out to pasture.  She was relaxed and confident.  The girls were in the truck a few minutes later and ready to leave.

“How did it go?” I asked.  Youngest Child talked about her great lesson and enjoyed her horse selection that day.  Middle Child was very excited about her lesson and even surprised herself.

Then she said this, “Hey Mom, now I think I can handle riding any horse here!”

Don’t you just love it when it is almost like they claim the epiphany you shared with them earlier?  It’s stated as if they just thought of it on their own.  Spoken like they just found the answer to a crazy word problem—and it was correct.  That, my friends, is what I like to think of as the ‘bonus’ in the parenting world.  You tell them something and then they see you just might be right.  (Someone please tell my kids I do know a few things…we will just go with ‘a few’)

This all made me think of choices that were in front of me lately.  If I do the groundwork and prepare and then pray about it, why do I seem to have heavy breathing?  Why do I let doubt creep in and tell me I am not able?

It comes down to trust.  I should trust in the Lord in all my circumstances.  Ask for direction and then… wait for it, LISTEN. 

Listen to wise advice.  Just like the Instructor knew my middle child and the horse, God knows what we can’t see at times.

When facing doubt, sometimes you just need to put your heels down and get mad.

Ride on with Joy,

Tracey

“If you listen to advice and are willing to learn, on day you will be wise.” –Proverbs 19:20 (GNT)

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart.  Never rely on what you think you know.  Remember the Lord in everything you do, and he will show you the right way.” –Proverbs 3:5-6 (GNT)

My girls during a horse show at the barn.

©2015-TraceySimpson