Thoughts on a Birthday

I realize that one of my last posts was a bulleted list of thoughts.  I have been shameful on here and have not had a post in months.  I promised myself that I will get back to this more frequently.  I said, “Self, it is a good outlet for all of your random thoughts. Get back on it.”  Unlike some people in my house, I did not roll my eyes at what I said. 

I thought this was a brilliant capture of me around age 4.
I am sneaking around in a garage trying to grab an animal and love it and
squeeze it.  Poor kitty. Oh how I loved animals...

There is reflection on some things that have changed or have become more noticeable in the last year or two.  So here are some random thoughts from today, which is actually my birthday.  I was born on Lincoln’s Birthday and two days before Valentine’s Day so that makes it easy for loved ones to remember.  Ha ha.  One would think…

Birthday thoughts and this season of life:

1.      Birthdays keep coming

2.      I guess #1 is a good thing because it means I am still here.

3.      Two out of three kids recommend reminders of a parent’s birthday because they can’t remember it.

4.      My dog and cat may love me the most around here (I live with some middle school kids, people).

5.      The laundry and dust bunnies don’t stop for birthdays.  Bless the laundry and those dust bunnies.  It means I have some people and creatures living here.

6.      In fact, attitude does not stop for birthdays.  See #4.

7.      I realize I need readers, stretching, good shoes (read: great insoles), sleep and patience MORE than I did a year or so ago.

8.      Adolescent hormones can really be a ‘Debbie Downer’ on most days.  Who are these Jekyll-Hyde people anyway?

9.      Friday’s tend to arrive with a big sigh of relief…until you get the social agenda of your Adolescents.  Why am I traded more now as a Chauffeur instead of a movie night buddy?

10. In the past year I have used so many passwords on tablets, computers, accounts, televisions, iPods and other things that plug in or use batteries.  I am seriously depleting ideas.  Please send me some new passwords.

11. I think my doctor roster has expanded. So has my need for vitamins.

12. I view appliances –both large and small—as an army of steel support staff.  This year I have had a hard time keeping my staff.  They have quit on me.  Big ones.  Shhh, don’t tell the refrigerator.

13. My stretch ‘Adolescent Social Hauler’ is known as The Beast.  The Beast is 9 and needs to keep with me just a few years longer.  I love The Beast more now than I did before.  It had a bad run with a giant buck on the interstate last fall. It saved me but needed many repairs.  The Beast is good and accommodates all of those growing long legs, extra friends, carpool and miscellaneous gear that must be carted around for three kids and the family.

14. Living in the ‘selfie generation’, none of my kids will take selfies with me.  I really don’t ask unless I have on makeup.  I am prepared but ultimately shut down. #Ineedpics

15. I crave wisdom more now.  I look to books, wise counsel (including our parents!), prayer and God’s Word.  Oh boy, parenting will really get you into some wisdom-searching, won’t it? While I am definitely flawed, I am certainly gonna work on things.  Like Lysa Terkeurst says in her book, The Best Yes, I am going to “show up to practice.”  Wisdom is hard work.  I need to practice it every single day.

16. I find I need to verbalize why I am grateful all the time.  Early this morning, I wrote in my journal three things of gratitude for today.  Here is what I wrote:

1)     Glad for birthdays so I can be grateful.

2)     Glad for the gift of family and friends who pray for me and love me.

3)     Glad for God’s love and The Word to guide me.

Until we read again, safe travels on your journey today.  May you find a moment to get your readers out, avoid some hormones and reflect on a bit of gratitude.

Me and my pony Duchess.  Circa maybe 5th grade.
Animal lover, horse lover.
Did not always love the brother in the background when he bothered me.
The days of sibling aggravation--you were always  one step away from getting punished.
Love you, Bro!

With Joy,

Tracey

“The Lord makes firm steps of the one who delights in him; though he may stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand.” – Psalm 37:23-24

To learn more about the book I mentioned, go to http://thebestyes.com/

Or check out Lysa TerKeurst’s Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/OfficialLysa

Stay In It

A Sunflower from my Garden, but I have not done much gardening recently!

Have you ever looked up and realized that time has just flown by you like a mosquito swatter on a hot Southern day?  That is how I feel about the past few months. I think it is just the result of having a few kids and hitting the ‘Tween’ and ‘Teen’ stages of their lives.  I swear I was just feeling like I was sequestered from the world in my house with a newborn, 18-month-old and a 3-year-old!  I was just there and those days seemed to really drag out, but seemed to be a blur at the same time.  Now my three kids are 13, 12 and 10.  What?  Slow down. Wait a minute.  Sit for a spell.

Ah housekeeping.  Never done.  Max, don't act like
you have not seen this before--I use it all the time!

Time flies so fast that some things fall by the roadside of life around here.  I have been beating myself up for not being able to complete various projects in my mental ‘To Do’ list since the summer.  Clean out things.  Find things.  File things. Paint things. Re-purpose things. Read things. Curtains.  Well, I need some more curtains. Anyway, here we are in mid-October.  The summer was great but school started way too quickly for my tastes.  The first day of school meant back to homework and activities and pounding an iron fist about studying and getting up earlier.  I think it is an added bonus that I have three kids in three different schools right now.  I have been frustrated.  I have felt hindered (not just with my ‘list’ but in the training of these kids and the preparing them). So with all the changes I have wondered, “What have I learned?”  I have decided to make a list of ‘Things’ I have learned in the past few months.

Here goes.  In the past few months I have learned:

• That I am reaffirmed in the fact that parenting will keep you on your knees…in prayer.
• That adolescent girls (and boys) have somewhat of a Jekyll-Hyde personality – like a viper snake on the turn of a dime.
• That just because at bedtime a kid says he wants a homemade breakfast burrito for breakfast the next day does not mean he wants it 8 hours later.  You gotta think on your feet.
• That sometimes I make my bed on school mornings and want to crawl back in.
• That I appreciate all the Algebra, Trigonometry and Calculus classes…that my husband took.  He helps my teen and is my hero.
• That according to my kids, I am always trying to “hide” their shoes from them.
• That singing Reggae and doing ‘The Running Man’ dance move at 6:30 am does not help my teen get up.
• That I need to cherish my 5^th grader who still wants me to come eat lunch with her everyday…before she turns into a viper snake.
• That I know very little and my teen knows everything else (he forgets I have been there).
• That I really can get up at 5:30 am on school days to have quiet time…before the chaos.
• That juggling multiple kids at this age is like a 3-ring circus.  I have clowns, bears and monkeys. You can think of the pros but I know the cons.
• That kids and electronic devices play out like a saga from Star Wars. The Dark Side can put up a good fight, wielding words or complaints with Light Saber speed and ability.  May The Force be with you.
• That carpools are the true gifts that you would never really know how much you love…til now.
• That I am cool.  I really am.  Someone please let my kids know.
• That the time your child comes back to you and says, “You were right, Mom” about something big… well, that is like getting a pay raise.

I know I have learned more than just this short list.  I am sure it will all come back to me like a boomerang hitting me mid-forehead.  You have to laugh at the things in life that seem to be frustrating or hindrances.  Like bad behavior, for example.  I won’t go on my soap box but I hope I can look back and laugh at some of these.  None of us are perfect and we live in a fallen world.  It is like I told my son, “Look, all of you guys in 8^th grade…you are all doofuses. But I was one too.  We all were.  It is a part of growing and learning.  It is awkward being a kid sometimes.”  What I did not tell him- it is awkward being an adult sometimes!  We never quit learning.

So with all the hindrances we all encounter, we learn.  Some are good or just not necessarily bad.  Trials are trials and everyone goes through a hard time here and there.  Some days I feel like I am treading water and not making a good time on free-style swimming.  Heck, some days I am swimming against the current!  I find comfort in the promise of keeping my faith despite tough times, and this will teach me true patience and the ability to endure (James 1:2-3).  I love this quote from Beth Moore I ran across this week:  “If Jesus gives us a task or assigns us to a difficult season, every ounce of our experience is meant for our instruction and completion if only we will let him finish the work…”  I like to say, “Stay in it!”  That is one of my favorite expressions lately.  Press on.  Meanwhile, I will take any offered cages for my snakes, bears and monkeys.

With Joy,

Tracey

“…As difficult as they are, you will ultimately find joy in them; if you embrace them, your faith will blossom under pressure and teach you true patience as you endure. And true patience brought on by endurance will equip you to complete the long journey and cross the finish line—mature, complete, and wanting nothing.” –James 1:2-4 (VOICE)

 

My sweet dog, Chopper.  Waiting to play.

I am with That Hotdog and Letting Go…Just a Bit!

The end of the school year is here and I am faced with the end of Elementary School for my daughter, Reese.  I can’t believe it is here and it seemed like yesterday we were watching her kindergarten graduation. How can that be possible?  Where did the time go? Am I dreaming?

Reese, my middle child, fits the profile of the ‘middle child’ in so many ways: peacemaker, loyal to peers, secretive and maybe even-keel.  I have been reading a book called, “The Birth Order Book” by Dr. Kevin Leman.  I will just say that this book is very interesting.  It will give you insight not only to your children, but your spouse and friends, etc.  I love what Leman says about ‘middles’, “I’m not alone in saying that middle children are a mystery.”  This refers to the fact that these middle child profiles are sometimes contradictory depending on the family dynamics.  Well, MY middle child does seem to have certain mysterious qualities about her!

I guess I am referring to the secretive ways she will go about her ‘business’.  Now, she is very open with us, but there is sneakiness to some things.  For example, you might find a candy stash in her room at any moment.  Another example, you may take her to get an ice cream shake and then later she has talked her dad into a trip to Baskin Robbins.  It is no secret that this girl loves food (a girl after my own heart)!  She has enjoyed more of an adult palate, has eaten a variety of food for years and really gets a good tug by her sweet tooth.  Reese has been called out by her friends as ‘happily swinging her legs’ during lunch at school.  She eats with glee.

As a middle child, Reese has found her niche as the family comedienne.  Loves a good joke.  Can seriously take a joke. Thrives on funny banter.  We can count on her to be the object of a fun prank, and then she can laugh about it almost immediately.  When she ran for a student council position this year, she loved the slogan:  A Treat You Can’t Beat – Vote 4 Reese.   Then wore a hotdog costume for her campaign poster picture!  One of my favorite pics is a picture of the two of us and I have a sign that says: I am with THAT hotdog!

I'm with THAT Hotdog!

Reese can be the peacemaker, but then also take sides in sibling argument exhibitions.  You may not know which side she will take at any given moment.  Then she will find herself in trouble for interjecting an objection or an alibi for one sibling.  It is all in the life of a Simpson, you truly never know what you will get. 

We all have our faults, and certainly in my house we have a few volumes of faults that anyone could file into different categories.  I try to teach my kids-and remind myself-that we can take our faults and use them to grow.  We are all different and this is a good thing!  I do have one question, why am I the one who must kill a bug when the kids find one?  I thought they would outgrow this!  I want some ‘sameness’ here.  Don’t be afraid.

With all seriousness, I do love and appreciate the differences of my three children.  Reese can be so caring and thoughtful.  I can often see her wheels turning in her head and then she will tell me something profound, sweet or funny.  I love the way she thinks and her expressions on her sweet face.  Reese also seems to have a way with animals.  It is funny that our dog and cat react to her differently than the others.  Reese does not rough-house with them and they are gentler with her.  I love her tenacious mentality when she is not able to do something well.  She makes up her mind and keeps working.  Reese is not perfect in this category and has experienced a few meltdowns.  But I have seen her grow.  She is a horse-lover (gets that honest, sorry Mr. Lizzard), and has come so far in her riding.

I am not sure what the Lord has planned for this child.  With each of my kids, I pray for them as they grow.  I want them to be confident in the Lord and want what God wants in their life.  Our job is to teach them, love and protect them. 

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. -Proverbs 22:6

It is so hard to do so often!  I struggle in this parenthood job more than any other job I have ever had.  This brings me back to why I am so weepy when they finish significant chapters in their little lives.  Each time they start a new chapter, I have to let go just a little.  It feels so hard to protect these kids when they are a little more independent.  Not just independent as they can get dressed and brush their hair and use the microwave, but independent from needing me. They don’t need me as much to have long conversations or play.  I need to keep reminding myself that they will always need me.  Unconditional love is what I have.  Just as the Father loves me in the crappy, goofy, sinful ways I exist, I love them.  Always.

So cheers to you Moms and Dads out there that become a little sappy with every new chapter!  We are kin in this way.  I will cry.  I always do.  (First and foremost, I am not as much of a hugger as I am a CRYER.  Know this.) I tear up.  There is joy in this!  I remind myself to focus on the future.  I wrote Reese a letter last night.  At the end I told her,

“Daddy and I love you and we are very proud of you.  We are so excited to see what God has planned for you.  Don’t think there is no plan, God has one.  Pray about it and seek His Will in your life.   He has claimed you here:

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. –Jeremiah 29:11”

This is Big Joy. 

With Joy,

Tracey   

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